Should parents spank their children when they’re naughty? Is spanking, as a form of discipline, still effective or are there better ways? Does spanking a child cause permanent psychological damage? Is spanking a form of abuse?
These are all questions you may be asking. You want to raise your kids right and do what’s best for them. I get it. If spanking can cause permanent emotional damage to your children or child, you don’t want to be doing damage. Right?
Has this ever happened to you?
You’re in the grocery store with your 4 year old boy, Ethan. Things are going pretty well, until Ethan decides it would be cool to grab one of the paper towel rolls in a stacked display. So he grabs one. Fortunately, the whole display doesn’t come down. In frustration, you snatch the roll from him and try to put it back where it was. This makes Ethan mad, so he grabs another roll, barely avoiding a collapse of the mountain of paper towels.
Now you’re getting angry, and grab the roll from him with even more gusto. This time you get down in his face and quietly “scream” , “Stop that, now!” Now Ethan’s buttons are pushed, and this time, in utter rebellion, he grabs an armful of paper towels. Sure enough, this causes a chain reaction and the whole display comes down.
Could this embarrassing scenario have been avoided? Did you react in the best way? Would spanking Ethan been the correct and most beneficial response?
This website will give you, as a struggling parent, some answers to the question, “Should parents spank their children”, and guide you to the best sources of up-to-date child raising techniques and philosophies.
The problem most parents make is they don’t apply the right form of discipline, at the right time, and in the correct proportion.
Is there a right way for parents to spank their children?
If you are part of the Christian faith, you’re aware the Bible states, “Spare the rod, spoil the child”. Maybe you were personally raised in a Christian home where spanking was a normal form of punishment. And if you’re trying to raise your kids based upon Christian principles, then spanking your kids is something you will probably be doing.
But you may have questions about how and where to spank your children. What’s your emotional temperature while performing the spanking? Are you angry? Is spanking your child a way to blow off steam?
A parent should never spank a child while in a state of anger. I know you’re human and there are times like the scenario mentioned earlier, when you do get angry. And spanking your child in a public place probably isn’t the best idea either. Just make sure you’ve “counted to ten” before disciplining your child.
Do alternatives to spanking work?
Whether you’re a non-Christian or a Christian who is questioning the benefits of spanking, you might have tried other forms of punishment for your kids. Things like “time outs”, grounding, or taking away privileges are some popular techniques used by parents these days. Do these forms of punishment work?
One important thing to remember about children and people in general is we’re all different. We have varied personality traits, temperaments, and we each respond to events differently. For one child, a stern look will sometimes be enough to correct, while another child may respond better to an actual physical spanking (done in love, of course!)
So I believe the key element to take away from this article, is every kid is different and requires a different form of punishment. Even kids in the same family should be singled out and treated as a unique individual, which is what they are! Part of parenting is determining the psychological and emotional makeup of each of our children and implement the correct form of discipline for their personality.
This, of course, is a very deep and complex subject and I’m not going to go into the psychology of child raising here. There are many good books on the subject and if you’re serious about doing what’s best for your kids, I highly recommend reading and studying these books instead of the latest novel.
So in answering the question “Should parents spank their children“, I believe in depends on your beliefs and the personality of your child.